I good friend of mine sent me this. At first, I thought it was your typical Nigerian scam email......but I kept reading. Make sure you do too.
SUBJECT: REQUEST FOR URGENT BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP
DEAR AMERICAN:
I NEED TO ASK YOU TO SUPPORT AN URGENT SECRET BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP WITH A TRANSFER OF FUNDS OF GREAT MAGNITUDE.
I AM MINISTRY OF THE TREASURY OF THE REPUBLIC OF AMERICA. MY COUNTRY HAS HAD CRISIS THAT HAS CAUSED THE NEED FOR LARGE TRANSFER OF FUNDS OF 800+ BILLION DOLLARS US. IF YOU WOULD ASSIST ME IN THIS TRANSFER, IT WOULD BE MOST PROFITABLE TO YOU.
I AM WORKING WITH MR. PHIL GRAM, LOBBYIST FOR UBS, WHO WILL BE MY REPLACEMENT AS MINISTRY OF THE TREASURY IN JANUARY. AS A SENATOR, YOU MAY KNOW HIM AS THE LEADER OF THE AMERICAN BANKING DEREGULATION MOVEMENT IN THE 1990S. THIS TRANSACTIN IS 100% SAFE.
THIS IS A MATTER OF GREAT URGENCY. WE NEED A BLANK CHECK. WE NEED THE FUNDS AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE. WE CANNOT DIRECTLY TRANSFER THESE FUNDS IN THE NAMES OF OUR CLOSE FRIENDS BECAUSE WE ARE CONSTANTLY UNDER SURVEILLANCE. MY FAMILY LAWYER ADVISED ME THAT I SHOULD LOOK FOR A RELIABLE AND TRUSTWORTHY PERSON WHO WILL ACT AS A NEXT OF KIN SO THE FUNDS CAN BE TRANSFERRED.
PLEASE REPLY WITH ALL OF YOUR BANK ACCOUNT, IRA AND COLLEGE FUND ACCOUNT NUMBERS AND THOSE OF YOUR CHILDREN AND GRANDCHILDREN TO WALLSTREETBAILOUT@TREASURY.GOV SO THAT WE MAY TRANSFER YOUR COMMISSION FOR THIS TRANSACTION. AFTER I RECEIVE THAT INFORMATION, I WILL RESPOND WITH DETAILED INFORMATION ABOUT SAFEGUARDS THAT WILL BE USED TO PROTECT THE FUNDS.
YOURS FAITHFULLY,
MINISTER OF TREASURY PAULSON
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5 comments:
haha - this is quite funny.
Personally, I don't have the econ know-how to understand what's best for our economy.
It seems like the two options are:
1.) Bail-out, resulting in short term economic success, but enabling our corporations and megabusinesses to know they'll always have a parachute and therefore can continue risky and unprofitable practices without risk to themselves
2.) No bail-out, resulting in a recession and/or depression, foundational restructuring of our economy, perhaps eventually making the economy stronger, but also there would be a chance we'd never fully recover from our depression before some of the Asian/Eastern economies assumed dominance.
Either way, this just sucks.
Wow we got screwed as a Nation Today. I'll never vote for an incumbent again. My recommendations are dump your dollars and American stock. Take long positions in the Euro and ADR Receipts and forget about American investments for a while. Also start taking deductions on your Income Taxes. I always used to overpay, figuring, "aww let Uncle Sam have the extra cash".
Never again will I do that as its not Uncle Sam that gets the Money, its the Banks,Wall Street and Congress that take your tax dollars for their own use. We Need a Third National Party!
Hi Big Chris and Welcome Wally!
Unfortunately, we have to do the bailout or the economy will collapse. BUT not on the terms Wall Street wants. The items under discussion now: taking stock in trade for the bail-outs, no golden parachutes, and the rest.
Wall Street says with those terms, firms might be reluctant to take advantage of the bail-out.....
THEN LET THOSE FIRMS GO BANKRUPT! No more free rides. If we're going to bail them out up to a trillion dollars, and they're more worried about keeping the beach house in Malibu, then screw them.
Someone or some government will buy them up at bargain basement prices and make them profitable again.
And if too many firms won't participate because of the restrictions, then either the stockholders will lynch the Board of Directors and replace it with a sensible one or we'll all go down together. NO MORE FREE RIDES!
And Wally, welcome! Unfortunately, a third political party wouldn't be any different than the other two.
People don't go to Washington to serve the nation anymore...or if they do, as soon as they sit in that chair, it's all about becoming a career politician. Say anything, do anything, vote for the wrong thing if it will bring you votes.
It's been getting worse for years and now....let's just say America is slipping into the sunset like England and France and Spain before it.
We're broke, bi-lingual and balkinized, over-taxed, the dollar is worthless yet we keep those printing presses rolling. And nothing is going to change for the better....because career politicians only care about securing their own futures. Democrats, Republicans, there's no difference. And a viable third party would act just the same.
Look at Ron Paul...he had some great ideas but also attached earmarks and pork spending for his district to every bill he could. And right in the MIDDLE of his Presidential campaign, he went running home to make sure he didn't lose his seat in Congress.
Just comfort yourself that one day you'll be dead and won't have to deal with this anymore.
And the same goes for America (except we'll still have enough rusty nukes to turn the entire planet into black glass if anyone messes with us)
Sincerely,
Mr. Unloadingzone
This bail-out was something pushed for shortly after the May/Mac bailout/buyout. On the day of the vote, the major credit lenders STOPPED lending! Why did they do that? It was pure pressure to get the yes vote. The representatives of the people rejected it. So now they pushed it through the senate, and brought the crack down on the reps to get it passed. $700 billion of hard working tax dollars will now go to the people who deliberately bent the system, gambled on sub-prime lending, and made huge profits from it. So much for a 'hands off' free market!
In the original bill, there was a part stating that the treasury needed an oversight/regulatory commission, to make sure it's not doing anything suspect...and guess who was going to be on the comittee making sure the treasury is behaving? Why, the head of the treasury of course! This is theft of ours, our childrens and grand-childrens money! They are the ones that will have to pay. Meanwhile, banks and their execs will continue to make bigger profits than the oil companies. It's disgusting, it's sick, and it's perverse, and there's not a thing anyone can do about it now. The Federal reserve (a private company, btw) and big money just played the politicians and the tax payer, and they won $700B! You lost, I lost...in fact, every working and middle class tax payer, and the next two generations of their children just got owned. A collapse is the only way that these people would have learned that for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. They've had it good for years, now we will help them keep that money rolling in as punishment.
Hi Anonymous!
And to add insult to injury to your comments above, while they voted a $700BB bail-out for Wall Street, the house proposed and approved a bill 368-28 extending unemployment benefits to everyone losing their jobs because of this near-depression we're in.
But it probably won't become law, at least this year BECAUSE SOME SENATORS WHO VOTED FOR THE WALL-STREET BAIL-OUT are flat-out REFUSING to let the unemployment insurance extension even COME TO THE SENATE FLOOR, let alone vote on it.
Too bad they don't teach that we revolted in 1776 because of "Taxation without Representation". Biden doesn't believe in it: he thinks it's "patriotic" to raise taxes: said so in the VP debate.
What's patriotic is to LOWER taxes, have SMALLER government, and let rich, guilt-suffering people like Senators Biden and Obama open up THEIR check-books and write 6 figure checks back to the Treasury Department.
I would applaud them for doing so.
Sincerely,
Mr. Unloadingzone
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